At the end of the day I guess I will only have myself.. No one what's to be there when you're going through shit.. Cuz at the end of the day NO ONE FUCKING CARES. The cold hard truth there for you.. I want to believe in the best of people.. But how can I when shit like this happened.. Everyone will always have a reason (they always do) I'm not saying that to make it sound like I don't understand.. I do I understand that you will let me down a 1000 times over and I will forgive each and every time.. Cuz that's what I do.. You will hurt me.. You will leave me.. I will be left here to pick up the pieces.. You think I will survive. You think I don't want to die. One day I will prove you all wrong. One day I will do so tired of the bullshit. Be left alone and I will not be available to take it anymore..
Some of you will read this and think Wtf.. That's ok I'm not saying this so you will understand.. I know no will.. I know I'm hard to swallow.. I know I'm not easy to hear.. But at the same time this is my truth.. No matter how fucked up.. It's mine.. I will take full responsibility for the backlash later on..
Most say they want to know what goes on in my head... It's a lie you really don't.. This is not a random.. This is how I feel day and and day out wroth I say the words out loud or not.. My feelings never change
I totally understand at the end of the day all you have is yourself, I recently gone back to adult college and here I am still feeling like a loner I visibly the most oldest in class can you believe I am in my thirties and everyone else are just kids, I just gotta grin and bare it, I am just gonna try and don what I can for the next thirty years and embrace my solitudeness.
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