sickly hissy fits (fight w/ mom)

flu kills

BPD (spliting) DBT skills

Ed on thanksgiving

The god honest truth

my feeling after the election/ update and mood swings

thanksgiving sucks for ED and update

shame from impulsive thoughts

i'm mad at my self for feeling this way in the 1st place who acts like this who?!? i got mad at my p-doc (so mad like over the top) and i didn't know want to do... i was like i know what i'll OD.. WTF is wrong w/ me.. i get mad and i was not even suicidal i just want to be like "see bitch; see what you made me do" the thing is that i didn't do it.. i didn't OD.. i didn't tell anyone i was going to OD to try to get some action from her... i use my skills and i got through it... but the thing is that i would it... i really truly thought that was a good idle... its to fucked up... i dissociate all the time so when i do off the wall stuff i don't remember it the next day... but i know that i have don't this awful manipulative things to ppl.. tell them the there going to be the reason i die and then OD/ or try to kill myself... and i know a number of those time i really didn't want to die i just want them to pay... to see how much they hurt me.... i looked in the mirror today and i hate myself.. i'm sickened by what i see... cuz all the horror stories that you hear about... all the fuck up things ppl say ppl w/ BPD do... there talking about me... before i was offended and taken back from the wronging ppl you send "RUN FAR FAR AWAY IF YOU MET SOMEONE WITH IN DISORDER" but now i you... and the funny part of it is... the truth makes me suicidal... #BPDsucks #kmn #fap #fml